Hello. I am Future Andy and this is the news...

The future needs your help. I made a mistake which has altered the course of history, and I need you to help me fix it. If you are completely out of the loop, it is currently the year 2059 for me. Things are a mess. The good news is that Robin, Andrew, and I have found a way to send messages back to your time. We even figured out how to send video messages to an old YouTube channel. You'll find a link to it at the bottom of this page. The problem is that you-know-who might be watching us, so we have to keep our messages hidden in puzzles and ciphers. On that note I better wrap this up.

So, go check out the merch and the youtube channel and help us flip the future.
-Andy

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PS Robin assures me that this font is big enough, but I'm not convinced. Your ancient devices have terrible resolution, don't they?

I mean,

I can't even remember the last time I had to depend on resolution instead of metalution. Yeah I'm pretty sure Robin is wrong. I'm going to size it up.